6 simple tools for a truly fulfilling love-life

By MiNDFOOD

Loving relationship
Six truths about loving the one you're with and creating a fulfilling love-life.

Having the freedom to be yourself is one of the major factors of a healthy relationship. However, according to self-development speaker, Dr Dain Heer, many people are inauthentic in their relationships and often hide or change parts of who they are to please their significant other – paving a clear path to relationship breakdown.

“Changing who you are in order to keep your partner happy is an express ride to a broken relationship,” Heer warns. “What I often see is someone voluntarily changing their actions and behaviours because they think it will please their partner. In fact, what often happens is the partner wakes up one day and realises that you’re no longer the person they fell in love with.

An internationally renowned speaker, and best-selling author and co-creator of Access Consciousness, Heer maintains that relationships are far simpler than most people realise, and that a great love life is all about being who you are … and encouraging your partner to be the same.

“Often times, relationships fall apart because neither you nor your partner are the person you were when you started the relationship,” he advises.

6 simple tools for a truly fulfilling love-life

To help individuals get back to the basics of a great relationship, Heer offers the following simple tips:

  • Don’t judge. You’re not wrong, and they’re not wrong. You just have differing points of view.
  • Be grateful for your partner … and tell them you are. A lot of us never tell our partners that we’re grateful for them. Find one thing each day you are grateful for about your partner and express that gratitude, out loud, to them.
  • Never go to bed on an argument. Don’t go to bed hating your partner, or while upset with them. Get it figured out and get it handled, every single day.
  • Have fun together. This is vitally important. Sure, you have jobs, you have children, you have all these other obligations that seem to take your time away. But if your relationship is important to you, create the time to get together and enjoy each other. That’s why you got together in the first place.
  • Honour yourself and honour your partner. Allow your significant other the chance to do things that honour (and inspire, uplift) them as an individual. Even if it you’re not included. If your partner likes salsa dancing, or fishing and you aren’t interested in the same activity – don’t try to stop them from doing it. Encourage them to do it! They will be energised from the opportunity and will come back to you grateful and more alive.
  • Start each day anew. Make sure every day to mentally ‘destroy and uncreate’ every wall that has come up between you and your partner, the day before. When you consciously destroy obstacles in your relationship, every single day, things don’t have the opportunity to build up and steadily (and stealthily) create an insurmountable divide.

“If you’re interested in creating a truly great relationship – not just with your enjoyable other, but with every relationship in your life – these six tools are the key,” Heer says.

“Sure, they’re simple”, he adds. “But, let’s face it – things have to be simple, or we’re not going to do it.”

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