the sick scent of guilt
pushed me over the
edge into polaroid memories
beaded promises strung by the
hands of a stranger
so clearly wrong that i kick
myself for not seeing it sooner
kick myself for believing
someone loved me for me
and not as a piece in a game
you’d sworn you’d never
learned how to play
you took me out back and put
trust in my heart
take me out back and put a
bullet in my head
i’d have drowned
in blood soaked stanzas
blood soaked stanzas
blood soaked
stanzas; i stopped because of
you
throwing up cries for help into
dollar store exercise books
wading through the tears of my
own sorrows
of an attention-starved kid
and now teeth-torn fingers
hesitate over the keyboard for
the first time in a year
hands quiver from caffeine
gulped down just to forget
greedy and longing for
something to fill the empty
i wish it was bleach
i’ll fall asleep so i can see you
again
he’s not you
but a character i  created
he saw me as the man i said i was
not the girl you know i am
i see you as the man you really are not the boy i called a friend
Tye Tran
Newcastle, NSW
