I’ve spent the last couple of days preparing a talk for the Passion for Life Expo in Sydney on Saturday. There will be a couple of hundred people in the audience, of both sexes, mostly single. It’s the first time I’ll have done a full-length talk on sex for an audience of both men and women. Usually I speak to women’s business networking groups or personal development or social groups, and occasionally to a small group of very brave men (men it seems are mostly not willing to go out in public and admit to being anything less than brilliant lovers!), and a few short promotional talks to mixed groups.

So an hour and a half presentation on how to have fabulous sex to a mixed audience who weren’t couples was initially a bit of a challenge – plus I was told by the promoter that it had to be interactive, more of a workshop than a talk! How could I get across the message without offending anyone, yet still be entertaining enough to hold the attention of such a large group for so long?

To be honest, I won’t know until Saturday, so stay tuned for my next post to find out how it went. In the meantime I thought I’d share with you some of the processes I went through in developing the material.

The first issue was simply my on-going challenge – why is our society so bashful about sex? Sex is one of the most beautiful and rewarding and life-enhancing experiences of all, yet it is shrouded in cloaks of unacceptability, offensiveness, shame. Some people wouldn’t attend due to prudishness, others would no doubt be expecting something highly titillating, with displays of sex toys and top tips for red hot lovers….

But learning how to experience good sex is neither offensive nor titillating. It’s not about tips, tricks and toys. Not that there’s anything wrong with those things, it’s just that they are the icing on the cake. You’ve got to bake the cake before you ice it.  In the case of sex, the cake is you. You’ve got to get yourself feeling positive and confident sexually before you bring in the titillating extras. A fabulous multi-speed, multi-pronged sex toy is not going to enhance anyone’s sex life if the users don’t feel comfortable sexually.

So how do you get your cake baked so to speak?  And getting back to my dilemma, how could I get an audience of hundreds to bake their cakes?

Essentially, at the most basic level, it’s about presence, breath and sensual awareness. It’s about being in the body, in the now, with the monkey chatter of the mind turned down low, so that clarity and calm come through. This leads to authenticity of self, connection, intuition and flow - and that’s what’s required for extraordinary sex.

So I have planned some activities which will have everyone in the audience feeling present in their bodies, using their breath, raising their energies, heightening their senses, getting connected to themselves.

I’m very excited about this. I’ll let you know how I go next post.

www.jacquelinehellyer.com