Meeting Sarah Jessica Parker feels like meeting a girlfriend for coffee – she is more interested in chatting comfortably than being preened and protected. During our interview it’s just the two of us. Not a publicist, agent or lawyer in sight.
I soon learn that Parker is a very normal (albeit exceptionally hard-working) woman who manages multiple large-scale projects and juggles many roles. She constantly stars in films and theatre productions. Her own production company, Pretty Matches, is developing a television series.
She has her own clothing line and two top-selling fragrances. And, of course, Parker is the star and executive producer of Sex and the City: the Movie, due to be released on the big screen on June 6. Off screen, Parker is married to actor Matthew Broderick, with whom she has a five-year-old son, James.
How does she make it all work so successfully, I ask, keenly aware of my own struggle to keep it all together.
“I learnt from my mother that you simply do the best you can,” Parker says. “Like a lot of women, I relate so much to wanting to be a lot of things to a lot of people. My child comes first and I couldn’t do what I do if he wasn’t well cared for and happy. Him being OK allows me to do everything else. If he wasn’t OK, I just couldn’t go on with the business.
"I’m lucky we’ve had the same nanny since James was four months old and that’s been enormously helpful. Of course, being able to afford good childcare changes my life from that of a lot of working women. My tip is do what’s best for yourself and your family and don’t let anyone else tell you what’s right or wrong. You know what’s best.”
Parker, 43, has been in the limelight since she was 12, though she really became a household name when the hit television show Sex and the City made its way into our living rooms in 1998.
Parker played the lead role of Carrie Bradshaw, a type of female character we were unaccustomed to seeing on screen: she was intelligent, independent and successful but also vulnerable, less than perfect and constantly challenged by life. “Carrie wasn’t an archetype. She was very dimensional,” says Parker of the character she played for six seasons.
Carrie seems so real that Parker often finds herself explaining to people that they are nothing alike. “The differences between us are vast,” Parker says. “For one thing, our life choices are radically different. I dated very little in my life. I’m a far less open person about intimate subject matter.
"I don’t really talk about sex in my own life. It’s just not my style to be forthcoming in that way. I don’t think it’s anyone else’s business. I don’t feel comfortable with those conversations, even with my girlfriends. I have a child. I have a husband. I have a far more conventional life than Carrie.
“Of all the characters in the show, I identify most with Miranda [Miranda Hobbes, the industrious lawyer who had a child, married, and moved to the suburbs, played by Cynthia Nixon]. I love the other characters but their lives are so different to mine. Like Miranda, I’m a working mother and it’s hard. It’s especially hard because it’s voluntary. Miranda isn’t forced to work; I’m not forced to work. I just get satisfaction from it.”
Has Carrie influenced Parker at all? “The show definitely taught me about friendship,” Parker says.
“I was always envious of the time the characters had together as friends. It was more unrealistic than the clothes they had – because life doesn’t work that way, especially if you have children – but I love the kind of friend Carrie was. I love the commitment she made – [whether she had] time or not – where her friendships would fit into her life. It has made me a better friend, because I wanted to have that and to be that, and to be that accountable.”
ACTION!
Investing most of her energy in the highly anticipated Sex and the City: the Movie, Parker hasn’t had much time for anything else in the past 18 months. As the star and executive producer, she says, “For me there is a lot at stake. I recognised that it was time for the movie; that it was now or never. After a false start just after the series ended – we tried to get a start on the movie in 2004 but it wasn’t the right time for Kim Cattrall and we didn’t want to do it without her – I started thinking about putting the movie together again in spring 2006.
"I got Michael [executive producer Michael Patrick King] back on board and we started putting ideas down. A lot of time had passed since the series ended and we couldn’t wait any longer. There was an interesting story to tell four years down the track. So I begged people [members of the original cast] not to take other jobs and I got it up and running.”
What has Carrie been doing for the past four years? “One of the things Michael establishes beautifully in the first few minutes of the movie is Carrie has been having a very successful life in New York,” says Parker.
“She’s in a successful relationship with a grown-up; they have figured things out; she really believes she knows this man and knows herself. She has had a lot of satisfaction in her work, having published two more books since the show went off air; in the movie she is working on her fourth. She still feels very much a part of New York City but she is a very different person, as we all are after four years.
“She has a lot more invested in relationships and things mean more, which means that loss and disappointment at this stage of her life have real significance, real meaning. Much of the movie is about comparing loss and disappointment when you’re 25 with loss and disappointment when you’re in your 40s.”
Is there that much difference? “I think the difference is monumental, because [when you’re in your 40s] you’ve invested a lot more time and the stakes are much higher,” says Parker. “When you’re young you can be more distracted from sadness. But as you get older, and when you’ve really loved and cared for someone and then you’re disappointed by them or you lose them, it’s a profoundly different experience, as it has more meaning.
“The other difference is that now you realise you have to fix things on your own. In the movie, Michael illustrates so well that when you’re a grown-up, your friends can only do so much. It’s always important to have them, but ultimately it’s up to you to fix things to make your life OK.”
NEW RECRUIT
At the time of our interview, the movie was in post-production and Parker wasn’t giving away any other plot secrets, except to say that Carrie dons a wedding dress…or two. She was also happy to speak about the new recruit to the Sex and the City team: actor Jennifer Hudson, who plays Carrie’s assistant, Louise, in the movie.
“Hudson is really good in the movie. She was so nice to have around because she was so excited,” Parker says. “It was important to Michael that we have a 20-year-old in the movie; that we recall what it’s like to be that age in this city full of hopes and dreams compared with what it’s like when you’re 40. Hudson’s character comes from St Louis and has a naivety that Carrie never had. Carrie is from the east coast. Carrie made the city how she wanted it, but Louise came to the city and allowed it to make her. They have similar characteristics, though, mainly in their pursuit of love.”
The addition of Louise also reflects the show’s new fan base. When Sex and the City was first released in the US, it was shown on the HBO channel, which allowed it to feature some very intimate scenes and themes. Then a less racy version was played on commercial television.
So what rating can we expect for the movie? “Soft R,” laughs Parker. “I’d like a very pretty pink Soft R, but that’s up to the ratings board. I think we understood the provenance of the show; we started with some intimate content that people expect. At the same time, this couldn’t be a movie about a bunch of girls running around New York having sex. That would be gratuitous and it’s not where we ended the show. Michael cleverly straddled (excuse the pun) both worlds: our first, more mature female and gay male audience; and our second audience, which is drastically younger. When Sex and the City aired on commercial television it also attracted straight men, which was a totally new market for us. Though the movie marries those worlds, it’s definitely not a family movie.”
In the movie, Mr Big (played by Chris Noth) is back. I ask Parker if she would be drawn to someone like her on-screen on-again-off-again love interest. “When someone keeps withholding things from you, you can’t help but be drawn in by them. Then if they throw you enough bones, you go,” she says. “Mr Big is also bright and successful. But I’m not Carrie – I don’t have her constitution.”
APPLE OF HER EYE
One thing that Carrie and Parker do share is their great love for New York City. It has been Parker’s home since she was 12 and she has no plans to live anywhere else. “I love everything about this city,” she says. “The MoMA [Museum of Modern Art] is incredible; the Met [Metropolitan Museum of Art] is always amazing; the theatre is great; Chinatown is my favourite place in the world. I just love walking the streets, because the city is full of surprises. It’s also great bringing up a child here. James loves New York. It’s a great privilege to grow up here. I’m very excited for him to experience it as a young man, to make it his city.”
In keeping with her love for the city, Parker is actively involved in many local charities, such as the Fund for Public Schools in New York City. “Lots of things come up that I may not be in a committed relationship with, but I just help out,” Parker says. “The Fresh Air Fund [which provides summer vacations to children from New York’s toughest neighbourhoods] is a favourite of mine.” Parker has also been involved with UNICEF for a long time, having been an Ambassador since 1997.
Parker doesn’t mind commenting on the impending US presidential election. “It’s a very exciting time to be a Democrat in America,” she says. When pressed about who she supports, she responds, “The way the press has been treating Hillary Clinton has been very upsetting and it has brought out a feminist resolve in me that I didn’t expect. I haven’t made a hard-core decision about who I’m going to vote for, but I have been very discouraged to see the bias against her and how transparent the media has been.
"She is extremely equipped to be president of this country. I think she would be right for this country, but I think Barack Obama would be very good for our international relations.”
Many people dream of moving to New York and making the big time because, as the late Frank Sinatra suggested, if you can make it there, you’ll make it anywhere. But, according to Parker, life in the Big Apple isn’t so rosy for aspiring artists. “The thing I will say about New York is it’s different to when I came here and it’s not as easy,” Parker says.
“When we moved here on January 2, 1977, the city was very different. It was a city for everyone. Now it’s a city for the very wealthy. When I first came here you could share an apartment on the Upper West Side and be an artist. Now you can’t. You have to find yourself some satisfaction in Staten Island, the outer sections of Queens or the outer sections of Brooklyn. It’s a different city and it’s really hard to be successful here. It takes a lot of work and it’s very frustrating, but nothing is more satisfying than experiencing success in this city.”
As the title Sex and the City suggests, the show’s themes often revolved around love lost and lust found in the city. So is it really that hard to find a man in New York? “I think it’s hard to find a good partner in any city,” Parker says. “I don’t think New York is any harder. The good thing about New York is you walk out into the street and there’s all this hope and potential. You’re pushed up against each other in this city. You just have to be willing to be surprised by someone and not have fixed ideas about who you’re supposed to date.”
See Donna Duggan’s blog on MiNDFOOD for a behind-the-scenes glimpse of her interview with Sarah Jessica Parker. Sex and the City: the Movie releases June 6.
DRESSED FOR THE CITY
Both Sarah Jessica Parker and her Sex and the City character, Carrie, are fashion icons who are always clad in something unique, which often results in a frenzied trend. Who can forget the “Carrie” nameplate necklace? Parker has her own clothing line, Bitten (available only in the US), which features comfortable, low-cost clothes. Here she answers the questions that women worldwide want to know.
MiNDFOOD: You must have one fabulous wardrobe!
Parker: My closet is very small. People are shocked; they are always very disappointed.
MiNDFOOD: What are you wearing today?
Parker: Halston jacket, Versace dress, Brian Atwood shoes, Fendi bag…but none of it’s mine.
MiNDFOOD: Did your ideas about fashion change while you were working on the show?
Parker: Yes, definitely. I learnt a lot from [costume designer] Patricia Field. I learnt there should be no rules. I think that’s why the hits were such hits and the misses were massive, but it was always great fun.
When I was growing up I thought that everything had to match; that you couldn’t even clash a colour. Then Pat was like, “Clash it, mess it up, dirty it up.” It was so liberating. It doesn’t mean that I will always have Carrie’s lack of modesty, though. When Carrie dresses, she likes having people look at her, but I don’t always want that.
MiNDFOOD: What won’t you wear?
Parker: Really low-slung jeans and anything that shows my midriff. It’s provocative in a way that just doesn’t sit well with me.
MiNDFOOD: Do you have any fashion regrets?
Parker: My wedding dress. It was the first dressed I looked at – and black. Matthew [Broderick] and I agreed we didn’t want to call attention to ourselves that day, because as actors we get attention all day long. But in hindsight I wish I’d worn white.
